Thursday, March 14

controlling your emotions

walking through parque retiro with aaron and amanda; madrid 2009

I'm in a very transitional period in my life, with things constantly changing (and I'm sure many of you are, too) and unfortunately, I'm not always able to control my emotions the way I'd like. Though I know it stems from feeling so deeply and passionately about so many things, I react strongly and emotionally to anything that's either promising or upsetting.

Recently, I told a friend about this issue. When I'm going on date after date and meeting guy after guy, I feel great. Though sure, none of them are the one or even the one for now, it still feels nice to be wanted by the opposite sex; that's natural. And when a new and exciting career opportunity presents itself, I'm on top of the world, confident as ever in my capabilities and qualifications. But when the dreaded Facebook photo of my ex with his new girlfriend surfaces or the job opportunity comes crashing down, my world ends.

I think this emotional roller coaster that I seem to be on is normal, but reacting so severely to the ups and the downs is definitely something I need to work on.

My friend told me that if I can stay in control of my emotions, not ever getting overly excited or devastatingly upset over anything (especially if a week later it could all change again), this roller coaster  ride and life in general won't seem as scary.

I've been really trying to work on it lately and what can I say? Though I'll never abandon my enthusiasm and excitement for things I truly believe in, I think she's right.

10 comments:

Brittany C. said...

but sometimes it's so nice to be happy!

My advice is to keep a gratitude journal (there's a great free iPhone app) -- it's helping me keep things in perspective!

muetz.tumblr.com

Jorie said...

I totally understand these feelings. Not getting your hopes up (as a girl) is so hard!

jorie

Courtenay Ackley said...

This might seem weird, but I learned to do this from golf. My coach told us the key to doing well was not getting too down about bad shots and not getting too excited about good shots. It's not always easy (and I don't always succeed), but I really notice the difference in how I feel when I can keep my emotions grounded.

Court
lovecourtxoxo.com

Jennifer said...

A friend told me to try to "respond" to situations (good or bad ones) rather than react. I think it implies that we have more of a choice over how we feel if we just breathe in and then respond in a slower way. I dunno, it's helped me :) I am definitely the same way. Super excited about things all of the time, and then terribly sad. Especially when the exes decide to show up on my computer.

Martha Rule said...

I need all the help I can get with this, it is so hard for me to stay "cool"

Kyla said...

I'm also in a transitional period in my life in terms of my career. I can go from being crazy happy to extremely bummed all at once. What I like to do (and it might sound crazy) is to acknowledge whatever extreme emotion I'm having (usually when it's a bad one) and take a deep breath. I've told my closest friends and family to let me know when I'm letting my emotions get the best of me, and it really helps just knowing what you're feeling and making a conscious decision to pull them back. Good luck :)

Ska_D said...

Reminds me of Sunyata

"At the point where we experience sunyata, practice becomes easy. When the sky is cloudy, the sun is obscured, but as the clouds evaporate, the sun's rays appear and become more and more radiant. Likewise, the more we let go of ego, the greater is the space created in the environment"

Katherine / Of Corgis and Cocktails said...

I have the SAME issues. I can let things get to me so easily. It's something I need to work on too - emotional roller coaster is not a fun ride

katie said...

i think this is so common - especially for girls around our age, because things DO seem like the best or worst things ever. like there's no in between. i try to give myself a day a week to feel my feels.. kind of a binge session, if you will. ;) and by a day, really i mean - i take friday nights and i sometimes watch the girliest movies or read the most middle school books, because austin is usually out of the house on friday nights. it really helps me to focus the negatives like that. not let myself even react to them until i can soooort of make fun of myself, while taking care of my emotional needs. if that makes sense. ;) either way, know that you're not alone.. and that the realization is the most annoying part of the rollercoaster. <3

Amanda @ Little Lady Living said...

i have an idea... we can just go back to retiro and let our troubles retire-o :)